Thursday, July 14, 2011

What do you think of this part of my story?

I actually like this excerpt. I want to know more about the relationships going on. Especially between Conner and Kirsten. Why is she there in the house with him? Is she an old friend? Is she simply his nurse. How did he get the concussion in the first place? I also want to know why Liam would be able to punch his brother so easily simply because Connor was defending Kirsten? I am really interested and would like to read more. I don't think it is a "sack of crap". I think it is pretty good. The details added made everything really easy for me to visualize what was happening. How old are these characters? I only ask because if Liam is in his 30's or older and still acting so rash then it would make me believe he still hasn't grown up and still insists on acting like a child. Are they rich? Connor seems well mannered which is why I think he may be rich. I'm just curious. Like I said before I'm very curious as to how this story will end and how it even began. It seems very good so far.

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